How many of us are ‘fronting?’
I just watched a discussion about social isolation and loneliness and realised that so many of us are probably really lonely. Even those of us who are surrounded by people physically.
How many of us via physical or mental illness, lack of confidence, age, obesity, poverty, or simply being different in some way feel completely isolated? Do you ever look at others and wonder why everyone else is having such a good time…and has it occurred to you that perhaps really they are not? It’s all an act!
Celebrities who seem to have it all… wealth, friends, fame…and yet…why then are they drinking and drugging themselves into a stupor?
I wonder how the numbers would be stacked if folks on social networks also stopped pretending about their lives (#blessed!) and admitted how isolated, disappointed, hungry (re:the women mostly), angry, lost, let down they really feel.
And I’m not talking about Facebook show-boaters who leave forlorn, cryptic ‘notice me everybody’ messages fishing for attention.
How many gamers, hackers, bloggers, website builders etc, revel in that lifestyle because, well, it fits in with the whole isolation thing.
How many people feel quite abandoned by family and friends? Has it been a while since you really talked to you brother or sister for instance…or they to you?
Perhaps that person you keep brushing off at work might be a little boring or awkward because they are lonely because everyone keeps brushing them off.
I think loneliness is more predominant in western culture because of the way we structure our lives, societies, behaviours and even buildings. In (some parts of) the West we kick our kids out at 18 because well…that’s the rule …isn’t it?
I would suggest that loneliness might be less in places like Africa or India with large extended families living together regardless of age and even with the addition of new family members via marriage and birth. I could be wrong of course.
So School Me!
Are you fronting? Putting on an act for others?
The big smile when you bump into the neighbour?
Are you the ‘Yes, everything is fine’ person, when it isn’t?
Would it be better if we could all just be honest? ‘No, I’m broke, my partner tolerates me, my job is crap and my life has turned out to be a disappointing heap of hell?’
Would that make us all more supportive of each other or would we get bored quickly and just see it (someone else’s stark reality) as whingeing?
Do you feel isolated and that no one really gets you?
Do you have any answers for people who might be feeling this way?
I could tick a few of those above could you?