Oh joy of joys! It’s that time of year again! Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Jack frost nipping at your nose…Or perhaps it’s the Christmas dinner getting burnt beyond recognition on a gas fire and your nephews new Christmas toy gun bullets zinging past your nose?
Let’s face it Christmas ain’t what it used to be:
- The unwanted stocking filler rubbish finding their way unceremoniously onto Ebay within 24 hours.
- The enforced ‘happy family’ get together and lets be honest just because they share the same family tree doesn’t mean you necessarily want to hang out with some of them!
- The abysmal TV schedules.
- The pressure on the cook (usually, but not exclusively Mom).
- Getting what is clearly the cheapest, nastiest card in the Christmas card selection box anonymously hand delivered on December 24th and knowing that basically they forgot you!
- The drunken office party.
- The pressure on parents purses to buy every viral toy for their kids because that Christmas tangerine and loving hug doesn’t quite cut it anymore.
- The annual Christmas and New Year punch up…I mean Sales Days, where people go out to embarrass mankind with their stampeding herd-like behaviour, braying, moo-ing and elbowing for some cooking pots they’ll never use and a large screen plasma TV.
And here’s another thing…who says that Ebeneezer Scrooge didn’t have a point? Why did all those poor folk keep having children they could ill afford? He practiced restraint, why couldn’t they? 5 children, 8 children 10, 12. Was it some kind of competition to see just how many children one could expose to unremitting disease, extreme poverty and hardship? If his beliefs, practices and behaviours were so wrong why were people always knocking on his door to share his ‘ill gotten’ gains? ‘What an evil greedy man you are…oh by the way, can you spare a shilling?..Yes you know from that money you accumulated by NOT behaving like the rest of us.’ BAH HUMBUG!
WHAT SAY YOU?
Is there anything really left to love about Christmas?
1. Woah! Ed…or should I say Edeneezer, (see what I did there?) Take a chill pill, it’s just a happy family get-together.
2. Too right Ed. Christmas is a joke that has had all the traditional significance squeezed out of it.