Ladies!..(And Gents) Is This Harassment?

This woman walked through the streets of NYC for 10 hours to document what most women have to put up with whilst going about their business. Ladies, we’ve all been there right?

 

So School Me!

I’ve had this in many countries around the world…in different ways.

In Africa you get catcalls but mostly unblinking stares from one end of the street to the other. In London, similar to the video but slightly more restrained. In Scandinavia, polite questions. In Paris, stares and a few cat calls – but not a lot. NYC has to be the loudest and most opinionated about one’s shape, butt and what they would like to do with you as in the video and in LA you get stopped so men can tell you their resume and about the ads they’ve appeared in! (I’m only partly joking!)

Now I’m a pretty down to earth gal. You be polite to me and I’ll return it. I said hallo to whomever said hallo to me, (this did include women I should add). It only took a second to smile and nod and then move on.

Sometimes you would get a persistent pest and you’d have to duck into a shop if they did not get the message that the conversation was over. But should I have had to do this?

Occasionally a man / boy would get aggressive because I did not care to share my phone number with someone I had literally just met…

I have also been followed, not just for 5 minutes as in the video, but all the way home at 3am by some c**t who stopped me from going out again socially until I passed my driving test.

 

Should I be screaming harassment – or is this just an unfortunate fact of life?

Is the video showing a woman suffering harassment?

Fathers, would you like men to treat your daughters this way on the street and did you do this to other folks daughters?

Moms, is this serious enough for one of those ‘talks’ with your daughters and what street harassment have you experienced?

And does it really warrant a raising money for a non profit dedicated to fighting street harassment?!

 

 

 

 

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117 thoughts on “Ladies!..(And Gents) Is This Harassment?

  1. Now that’s one emotion…even though I am a male Homo sapien, I just don’t understand! I have acquaintances who will not fail to comment, in detail, about the physical features of every woman who passes by on the road…and decide whether she is a slut or a virgin or what not…just by looking at them!! I mean, I can understand that it is natural to look/glance, if an attractive person walks by…but what compels men to open their mouth every time and pass uncharitable remarks…as a man…i don’t understand! I guess…i am not man enough! πŸ™‚

    1. ..or alternatively you are the man and they are boys.

      Now that’s a shame I was hoping you could enlighten me as to why they feel the need to behave this way? Is it to appear more masculine to their peers?

      1. I don’t know…I guess some of them are simply frustrated beings, while for others it is just that they believe there is nothing wrong in doing such things…maybe they have seen society behave with women in similar fashion,while they grew up, and don’t see anything wrong in this…not sure, though!

  2. I think that was harassment for sure. Anyone should be able to walk the streets without being hit on. Is it any wonder though? What do we see on television and in Hollywood movies? What do we see in most rock and rap videos? How many commercials still degrade women on some level or are they presented as a sex object? Knowing how we have been, and continue to be conditioned by many sources… there are however, some women that would complain if no one noticed them at all. It depends on your conditioning. Older women liked the attention. Today women seem to want men to either fix things, watch the kids, and be less aggressive… the times. All I can say to add to your video… what would had happened if you were wearing short shorts, high heels, and a tube top? You would have been probably raped. I find the city as bad as country life… people do not change from place to place, no matter what Hollywood depicts in their movies. You have animals every where. I would say you are attractive as well, so try your experiment with someone who looks more plain with a ankle length dress and glasses, and see if it gets you the exact same results. Maybe so!

  3. This is absolutely sexual harassment. Your example of the question is important as I have a wife, two daughters, three sisters. Most people get your point but unfortunately too many miss it as it grazes their hairline.
    Great post, awesome blog site.

  4. I watched this video with my 24 year old son and my two younger sons, and our take on this, is that it is a flawed experiment. First of all harassment is when someone relentlessly annoys you. A lot of these guys are just being friendly. Some are just very complimentary. What I don’t get is how the young woman is just ignoring them completely which tends to encourage some to engage more. This is not my understanding of what harassment is.

    1. I agree it is slightly flawed, but the point it is making is valid I think. Whether the exchange is polite or impolite, there is not the same expectation of men to smile and behave in the manner requested by a complete stranger. I also don’t believe that many overweight women would be equally greeted in the street in the same way, so I don’t believe it’s just politeness at all.

      For me it has never been a problem to smile back and say hallo and keep moving, for others maybe it is. Not everyone is in a great mood everyday. I have had to alter my route sometimes when I can’t raise a pleasing smile just to avoid hurting the feelings of folks I don’t even know.

      Like I said to someone else, I doubt very much that Mike Tyson gets told to smile when he is walking down the street – or followed silently for 10 minutes.

      In a lot of cases the young woman engaging would also encourage unwanted attention as the response of the stranger is not under her control.
      This is the point that is being made. Now whether you think that is important enough to be made an issue of is another question. Some think it is. Some don’t. Whilst I think some of the comments were just NYC street banter, I think the point of the video has some merit.

  5. Hi, LOL, I’m a New Yorker and seriously this is just part of our street “culture”-for lack of a better word. I don’t take the whole thing too seriously and I don’t take any guff—but having said that there are some pretty disturbed people out on the streets so I also believe in The New York State of Civility SOLOL because one HAS TO think of their safety as well! πŸ™‚

  6. What gets me is that I cannot engage, whether with eye contact or by saying hello back, because the man may interpret it as something more than friendliness. So my actions are shaped by the behavior of people I don’t know and will likely never see again. That is harassment. Perhaps him saying hello to me isn’t but the norm that tells me not to engage is. The creepy following for 5 minutes thing is pure intimidation for no apparent reason other than he wanted to feel stronger than someone else. No amount of money is going to fix that.

    1. Yes, I have read a few folk saying suck it up and maybe I would have said that before, but not everyone handles things the same. The reality is of course that you have to suck it up anyway as it isn’t changing any time soon.
      But perhaps with the awareness from this project things might shift…a little.

      1. Clearly these guys need to find something more worthwhile to spend their time on than sitting around gaping. It’s almost a game for them to see if they can get a reaction.

  7. As a mother of two boys, I wouldn’t want to see or hear them talk to a woman the way these men did. It is disturbing when men look at a woman as sexual objects. The only way to stop this is for mothers/parents raise their children- girls and boys- to be feminists. I know I am and my boys understand the concept of feminism.

      1. Yes because the values you keep in life is first learned from home. Some of my friends think that if you teach boys to be feminists it will make them gay (and so what if they do). No one understands that boys can be feminists as well. And I always tell them ‘look, there are three boys in this household, and being the (stay-at-home) mom, I control the household.’ 😜 haha!!

      2. By the way, I’m not sure if you are an American, but FOX news deemed this video “overly sensitive”. According to them, the woman was not harassed, and the men were in fact friendly. So I say if there was no harassment, then can’t women just walk in peace? Geez. I don’t ever hear or see a woman saying “hey can’t you smile or say hello?”, “oh hey handsome”, “damn!!”when they see a man passing by or walking alone.

  8. Try to think about it in another way. There are women out there who probably feel unnoticed and would be so happy to just be noticed one time by a man. A pretty woman that gets catcalls shouldn’t think of it as a negative thing. While it may be “annoying,” it is still a compliment. Women need to stop complaining about everything, calling it what it is not. Someday we are going to live in a world where no man says anything to a woman for fear of being harassed. Then how will we feel?

    1. Yep, this can go way too far the other way too. But I don’t think it’s just the catcalls, it’s the delivery of the catcalls and the perceived intent. If a woman feels intimidated or the attention is simply unwelcome is she not allowed to feel entitled to be hacked off?
      For me the intimidation comes when you are worried that if you ignore it it could escalate to a problem or if you reply nicely it could encourage unwanted attention.

      Imagine if this happens to you every single day and you were not equipped to deal with it as not every woman is ballsy with a smart-alec answer ready.
      The stalking I got pissed me off but the catcalls and the ‘hallo’s’ rolled off my shoulder…but that’s me. Aren’t other women entitled though to say ‘I don’t feel comfortable I wish it would just stop?’ School me here, genuine question, is that what you are saying. Suck it up. You should just stop complaining?

      And ‘dayum look at that fine ass’ is a welcome compliment you’d want someone to say to your daughter?! Where’s the respect?

  9. When it’s just a hello or a smile then I return same but the hey baby! Dayumm! Can I get your number? or walking too damn close? Nope! That is harassment and scary as hell! If I want to start a conversation with you I will but don’t press it! These are the same idiots that if someone said something to their girl (if they had one) would be ready to fight.

  10. I don’t for a second believe all “men are pervs.” NYC is full of brash and annoying people. Also there is a social climate in the US today that no one wants to talk about–young black men who know they intimidate people and can get away with it. I blame that on a society that devalues men, uses them for child support (even sometimes when the men aren’t the fathers!) and then says hey making babies is all about a woman’s body, really? If that were the case then men shouldn’t have to pay anything.

    Maybe if more men weren’t opting out of marriage because the “empowered” women now can destroy a man’s reputation and financial future for life, they’d be there to train up young men of integrity. I’m so tired of women playing the victim card when we’ve long since passed the wrong side of inequality.

    Women don’t cat call but they cry rape after drunken sex as if every college boy is forcing them to kick back a few shots. Remember Duke U? The athletes were innocent. Reality is hard. If we really think it’s okay to say all men are pervs, I hope we don’t have sons–just little boys destined to be hated by women.

    1. Thanks MF. Your comments are very general. I’m sure SOME young black men are intimidating as I’m sure some white men are too. One of my stalking experiences was a car full of drunken white boys late at night, the other was a black man.

      I’m pretty sure that empowered women is not the reason for quite a few fatherless children. If you are a man and want to opt out of marriage because you are scared of an ’empowered’ woman, how about keeping it in your pants til you find a weaker woman?

      SOME women have cried rape to save face after a drunken night but you sound like it’s all women and hardly anyone here (if anyone) has said all men are pervs, just the ones who are indeed pervs.

      If you want to speak about young black intimidating men then take the floor! You can talk about it here no problem. Let’s hear your views on it. Genuinely interested in all views and experiences.

      1. Yeah, I was being pretty general (not always a good thing). I didn’t mean for it to sound as if only young black guys are jerks. I feel sorry for all of the boys out there who have no father figures–that’s what I was aiming at. In the video the stalkers happened to be black so I was just thinking about them in particular.

        As a former teacher in a mostly black school I can say that teenaged boys and young men like to strut a little too much when there aren’t father figures around to put them in their place (this goes for my own son as well). Fathers are important and men are in general.

        I just think women should re-think the empowerment movement. Yes, it’s good for women to have equal rights, but not special privilege and not with so much man-bashing. I saw it sooo many times in my feminism classes. Women just pounding on the one or two guys (fools) who dared try to figure out feminism.

        As a woman I feel responsible for my own choices–like getting drunk or getting pregnant–but we can’t have it both ways. We can’t say it’s my body/my choice then make men stay on the hook for 18 years. Just the other day I read a story about a guy who has to pay thousands of dollars in back child support for a child the mother admits wasn’t his.

        If we really want to be strong then we should stop highlighting our victim status so much and maybe see that not all men–or even most–are scums or our meal ticket.

        Obviously I feel very strongly for human rights–both men and women. I got a little fired up because I love men and boys no matter the color.

      2. I hear you. Have to agree with all your points here.
        ‘Women just pounding on the one or two guys (fools) who dared try to figure out feminism.’ Lol! Women have to figure THAT one out first!

        The back child support thing sounds crazy and I will never understand divorces where someone has to pay someone else a living after a relatively short marriage – usually the man, but look at Halle Berry.

        ‘If we really want to be strong then we should stop highlighting our victim status’ – this bit Is really interesting. It is indeed hard to be both strong and a victim at the same time so I believe you are perfectly right. One of them has to be kicked out if there is to be progression.

        It’s a toughie MF! I agree with the meal ticket thing also, however when you get a strong independent woman with her own money some men will say they find this intimidating and they feel they have no role to play. it’s never easy to find a partner let alone one who can hold his own…or her own without blaming the other sex for THEIR shortcomings.

  11. Hi, the “saying hi” comments are interesting, because are those people speaking to her first saying hi to EVERYONE? If not, then it is a subtle form of harassment. She’s being picked for a greeting, and if she greets back, then is that an invitation for more conversation? On the other hand, I was in Turkey a couple of times, and when my female traveling companion and I (we were dressed conservatively) DIDN”T respond to such greetings, several young men yelled obscenities at us. One even followed us for a block yelling at us. We learned that if we said hello back, it was considered polite and they would leave us alone. But, I still believe my first statement is true–unless the guys are saying the same to everyone, it is harassment. If we say hello back, we are fulfilling their ideal of us being polite and submissive and receptive to contact. If not, we are “bitches.” We survive by saying hello back. That’s the reality from my point of view.

    1. I have only just said the same to another commenter. It is not up to men to decide what we are, whether we choose to pleasantly answer back or ignore them. Both are a woman’s prerogative. This is what they (some of them) don’t get.

      Miss Lady in the video doesn’t have to smile because some guy on the street thinks she should. Go tell that to Mike Tyson when he passes by.

      And what if both of you were deaf in Turkey?
      Of course then you wouldn’t hear the abuse either, but what if they decided to get physical because a woman apparently snubbed them. The tossers need to grow up.

  12. I’ve read lots of stories like this, but to be honest I’ve never experienced it or seen it happen. I don’t know if I’m just that oblivious, or if for some reason it just doesn’t happen down under. The closest thing I have gotten to a man approaching me about my looks was when this older male couple said I coordinated my outfit beautifully. Go figure.
    Having said that, I think I would lose it if someone started harassing me like what seems to happen in New York. Which probably wouldn’t help matters, I just don’t expect I would deal with it well. I never could put up with bullsh*t.

    1. As long as it was casual and did not feel entitlement to a response.
      I find it strange that a lot of these characters similar to the ones in the video would not shout ‘Good day to you sir!’ to any passing men.

      1. actually we do nod tip say whats up and acknowledge

        if only women would sit one day and agree to what is acceptable or not draw the lines and stop the vagueness of this issue.
        P.s
        i dont believe in flirting in the street or any environment unless there is an obvious mutual acceptance.

      2. When you nod and acknowledge other men do you then follow the man for five minutes? Do you follow the man to his home for over an hour as happened to me? Do you cuss him if he doesn’t nod back? Do you make remarks about his ass or his manhood as he is passing?

        As for your second point, you see there lies the problem fais. We are not one homogenous group. We are varied. Do all men think and behave the same? Can we draw up some agreement on how every single one of you should behave also?

        Some women may like those advances and others clearly not and yet somehow it seems so hard for some men to accept that a woman may simply not want to have to speak to them.

        Like you said if you make an advance and receive little interest back off. Don’t follow. Don’t curse and no she is not a lesbian! πŸ™‚

      3. It doesn’t have to be punishable by law fais. It’s just simple respect from one person to another. Gauge the situation and act appropriately. Every situation will be different as every person is different.

      4. P.s the example u used of following happened twice in the sample studied doesn’t carry much weight :-p although that be annoying and stupid lol would stop and slap

      5. good morning dear nemesis of mine was going through YouTube and found this vid lol loved it was an experiment made on men.
        happy Halloween
        and have a great day

      6. If I am your nemesis I feel I should have a more powerful Marvel comic name like The Dark Editor! (So say this next bit in a deep American movie voice) And as your nemesis I have won (yet again) dear foe…for you forgot to put a link…mwah…ha…ha…ha!

  13. I also think, as someone else in these comments, that the girl could have replied some of the “hi”s. But if the comments become too insisting or the “harassers” start following you, then this is not good!

    I am happy and a little surprised that no “Italian” bad example or wrong reference or exaggerated benchmark was mentioned!
    Normally we Italians are sadly and dramatically famous for verbally…annoying pretty girls.

  14. Hello, I think that basically, men have a base need to ‘hunt’ women, unless they are gay, in which case they openly hunt men which no shame and are proud of it, and their efforts are welcomed by the men they turn their attention on.

    I think that the guy that followed her for 5 minutes or longer WAS harassing her, and as she had camera men watching her, she should’ve given him a tight smack in the chops! but the others were just doing what men do. They saw a sexy ‘chick’ (as they see all women), and displayed their feathers (colourless and boring sadly) in all their glory with silly ,(what they thought were ‘cool flirtatious remarks) ….as if…….

    Some women would have giggled, so obviously these guys have received the attention they’ve sought before from brainless, ‘on the shelf’ desperate women, and this does a lot for their ego’s. Look at them…..!!! They don’t have much going for them, poor things…..so I reckon, they are simply being men who come from a very low class society, don’t know any better, have massive ego’s, probably use copious amounts of drugs, and if this woman was not surrounded by a camera crew, she could’ve been in trouble.

    What worries me the most, is that all of these guys were African Americans. Where are the Caucasian men? Or did I not see right? Is this just a particular neighborhood, or is this kind of behavior natural amoungst African Americans?? (NO racism people, please, I’m stating a fact from a video and asking a question).

    Funnily enough, I grew up in Africa, and NEVER, not once, has an African man ever whistled, or approached me in any disrespectful way at all. Ever. So, perhaps it’s not African Americans, but simply the American culture and the poverty mindset and way of life of these people that cause this kind of behaviour.

    They seem to take on the behaviour that they see on television, having absent parents, or perhaps poor parenting, poor role models, and society as a whole is truly f###ed up!

    Teach your children well….

    1. Well written as always. Definitely poor role models and yes she might try walking through the financial district and see what happens there although that is certainly no guarantee of meeting gentlemen having worked there.

      In your part of the world I had attention but it was mostly polite questions friendly introductions to chat, which was different from W. Africa.

      There is also this idea I have heard many a time that nice guys don’t get a look in and are snubbed as this woman appeared to do in the video. There is never a sense of self query. Who says you are a nice guy? Just you? What exactly do you have to offer these women who don’t want to know you standing on a street corner howling at them?

  15. Most of this wasn’t harassment, I would be more than happy if someone said “have a nice day/evening”. Sometimes you have had such a bad day that something like that can just lift your mood a little and show you that people do actually care, you know? However people just saying “daymn” or “nice”, yeah, that needs to stop

  16. What is shows is a woman walking in a poor area of town… I didn’t see one single “gentleman” in the whole picture. I don’t compare myself to garbage like those in the video, so I don’t feel badly. πŸ™‚

    1. No it was a hidden camera and yes, for me that was the 3rd time I was followed at night, although the other 2 were not an hours bus ride to my house including a change of bus and even sitting behind me tapping me on my shoulder. It was really the last straw.

  17. This video reminds me of P.M. Forni’s words on the 25 rules of civility ~ β€œCivility means a great deal more than just being nice to one another. It is complex and encompasses learning how to connect successfully and live well with others, developing thoughtfulness, and fostering effective self-expression and communication. Civility includes courtesy, politeness, mutual respect, fairness, good manners, as well as a matter of good health.”

  18. I have seen this video all over FB and have read some comments, most being nasty towards the woman even from other women. I think it is a form of sexual harassment. Some of the guys that said hello, God bless you, they said it in a certain way that you can tell it was more than just a friendly greeting. I think it’s disgusting behavior and whats even more disgusting is when people (men and especially women) “blame” the “victim”.

    I have had this kind of treatment before. When I was a teen, I looked older than I was. I used to get cat calls all the freakin time. One time even when I wore baggy pants, a baggy jacket and my hair was a mess, I still got cat calls. I guess in some way it’s a tad good for the ego but it’s also very annoying and kinda scary at times. I’ve never been stalked though. I have also had guys just say hi and smile. I’ve had a guy a few months ago told me I was very pretty. It made me feel a little uneasy but also made me feel good. I did say thank you but kept walking. He stopped and turned to look at me I guess hoping I would stop but I didn’t. I think that time even though he was trying to pick me up, he also said it in a respectful manner which to me it made that different than the other times when I’ve had guys yell at me from a car window etc. I really do think at times it is harrassing and other times it isn’t but some women might think so. The video to me was pure harassment.

    As far as a campaign to stop street harassment is stupid. You can’t stop harassment just like you can’t stop drugs, abuse, bullying etc. It is apart of life unfortunately. We can however bring more awareness to it and educate people more on the subject and hopefully get some to stop blaming women for everything that gets done to them/us. Sorry to hear you were stalked.

    1. Good points. We have to remember that jackasses exist in both sexes and not tar a whole sex with the few.
      Someone said that she was dressed sexily in order to blame her for the attention when clearly she dressed in black done up to the neck, sneakers and barely there make up, (if any) to prove the point that clothing makes no difference.

      The abuse women get online is merely an extension of this and just shows the dysfunction and entitlement some men feel they are owed from women they don’t know.

  19. I have honestly never seen anything like that. I’ve found in many parts of the world men can be quite forward – France in particular but also in some Asian countries. I’ve always put this down to cultural differences. Similarly, men who have been drinking can be rude, aggressive and overly attentive but that’s not all men and it’s a pretty specific situation.

    To me, an appreciative wink or smile doesn’t constitute harassment and can be flattering (and I’ve been known to give the odd appreciative smile to men I find attractive). Comments like that girl got would be uncomfortable (and based on their figures she was averaging ten an hour) but having men actively follow you would be scary.

    All that said, I wouldn’t be donating my money to their cause. I doubt what they can do to stop it and, for the ten men an hour who were classless pigs to that girl, there were hundreds who weren’t.

  20. To tell you the truth, I think we’re living in a sad world when somebody thinks, “hey girl you’re beautiful” is harassment. Gee, how hard is it to walk in the world and be admired or spoken to by others? Poor baby.

    I have gotten some much ruder comments before. I completely freaked this one guy out by getting in his face and offering to take him up on his offer. He completely melted, red faced, couldn’t get out of there fast enough. A lot of men are like that, they just want to make cat calls, not have a relationship with you, not intimidate you. They want to be seen, too.

    Men actually face a whole lot of garbage walking down the street, too. They are the ones most likely to be victims of violence and homicide.

    1. Most likely to be attacked than a woman who in addition to what men can be attacked for have sex based attacks to deal with in much larger numbers than male victims? I find that hard to believe. Any stats?

      1. It is hard to believe, but our perceptions are really shaped by our biology. We’re more protective towards women, so we focus more on the harm that is done to women. Some 76.8% of homicides involve male victims, drive by shootings, drug, gangs. Men are more likely to be perpetrators of violence, but in far greater numbers, they target other men.

        When a woman is assaulted or killed, people are outraged, the media focuses on it, and emotions run high. For every woman killed however, their are nearly 7 men who receive almost no attention.

        When you just take a look at the statistics you start to realize that men in general are actually quite protective towards women and somewhat gentle. Yes, there are cat calls and sometimes intimidation and lewd remarks, but compared to the atrocities they do to each other, it doesn’t even compare.

      2. That’s interesting. And I can believe that in that particular area i.e drive-bys, drugs and gangs, particularly as they are fighting other males predominantly for ‘success’ in those areas.

        Maybe I was throwing rape and domestic violence with the street homicide into the pot in my head.

  21. At least most of those comments were polite, even if they were unasked for. Not being alone doesn’t always save you from harassment, I’ve had guys yell at my husband/boyfriend, usually something like “Fuck her mate, we all did”.

    The guy silently walking with her for five minutes was very scary! I can’t help but think he was trying to intimidate this woman.

    1. Pity we can’t turn the tables and have a day doing it to men so they can see how annoying it can be. Not the little ‘good morning’ stuff, or even POLITELY expressing interest in a female, but the bigger stuff such as women having to alter their day, errands, routes, social behaviour to accommodate cave men.

  22. I do think it’s important to teach our kids to ignore cat calls and harassment as well as to not be a part of it…its just as important for them to learn to be respectful if they want the same respect extended to them.

    Giving to a non profit to fight it? I’m not sure theres a cure or solution to stop stupid stuff from coming out of peoples mouths…sorry to sound flippant about it.

  23. I no longer think that men can help themselves from noticing a large ass and a tight t-shirt and hoping that they are noticed in return. It’s some ape thing in their psyche. Even full-on burkhas don’t stop this. No, it doesn’t warrant a non-profit. A better option is thicker skin, a handful of keys and pepper-spray at the ready.

      1. What really brought this whole instinct thing home for me was watching a documentary about the praying mantis. That poor thing. Two brains and he’ll sacrifice his head, not that he isn’t torn (ha ha).

      2. It’s an interesting point, but it’s probably about time now to swap instinct for intelligence and acceptable societal behaviour. How many millenia have they had to learn?

        Was that you joking lol? Taxi!

      3. I don’t think instinct can be swept aside. Most people deny they even have it — first problem. Without acknowledging its power, it’s pretty difficult for anyone to choose a different behavior.

  24. Okay, well, obviously this is a video proving the objectification of women. Honestly I didn’t know it extended that much (I mean, “I just saw a thousand dollars”?) I honestly wonder what makes a man want to say that to her?

    But since I’m a male, I could sort of try and rationalize this. There are woman/girls who wish they were being noticed, yet calling it harassment when it actually happens. Sure, they called her beautiful, asked how she was doing, and even “God-blessed” her, but it seems that their motives were clearly not in her favor; the guys immediately saw this girl as a potential lover.

    If I saw someone like that around my age walk past me, I would probably look, but not go out and interrupt her business, unless she was specifically looking for attention. But see, some men may have thought she was according to what she was wearing, or any other body language that was misinterpreted, and they all dealt with it different ways: Some remained quiet, some said a quick “Hi how are you?”, some followed her for a bit, not picking up on the signs.

    I just think that men need to stop acting like that, and see a woman for who she is, not a walking 1000$ present. That’s why there’s sex-trafficking in other parts of the world, because the laws bounding us aren’t effective elsewhere. But I also think that no amount of money donated towards a cause will ever change that. This has been going on for thousands of years, because men struggle between love and lust, usually falling for the latter.

    1. Also — you have to have some sort of sympathy for the men. We don’t know what they were thinking, but a possibility could be that they’re desperate to fill a void in their lives, and they’ve been taught by peers, adults and the media, that women could fill that void in their lives. Many, if not most, men feel incomplete without a female, and different men go to different extents to find that fulfillment. It’s very basic and natural, yes, but I actually know that feeling. The men highlighted in this video just dealt with it differently.

      So is it really a “Men are pervs” issue? From a woman’s standpoint, probably. But I think the last thing we need is more reducing of men to mere animals, and that we should actually train them up to be true representations of the right kind of men, so that women wouldn’t have to count the times they were hollered at in the streets.

    2. Thanks for that Atherz097. Is there really no hope of re educating baby boys though?
      When a grown man is making the $1000 remark to a woman can he really not see his own daughter walking that street on any other day?

      1. They just need the right role models. I don’t think a campaign can do that, because it’s a little deeper than “Just make them stop.” And it’s also not easy when we’re bombarded with this “You need to be with somebody to be somebody” mindset, and the “Sex is the ultimate prize” ideology, that we’re practically taught to accept from multiple sources at a young age.

        I don’t know, I just have doubts that a society clean of this would ever happen from human efforts.

      2. Yeah, that’ll keep women safer, but the issue will still be there. In fact, some men are so crazy that even cars aren’t enough. The small time from walking out of a building, to the safety of your car, could be the most frightening moment of a your daily routine. -sigh-

  25. I understand that cat-calls are annoying, and there was nothing okay about those guys following her even when it was clear that she wasn’t interested in talking. However, saying that sleazy words and gestures from random losers on the street is worth donating/taking legal action over is pushing it a little bit. There are worse things that could’ve happened to her; did anyone see someone actually touch her? I didn’t. I definitely don’t endorse the idea of women being “objects,” but I believe in the old “sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me” idea. Cat-calls, winks and whistles aren’t worth getting THAT stirred over. Just do like this woman does and go on about your business. If they don’t back off, that’s where the real problem starts.

  26. Watching this I thought 80% of the comments were simply a friendly hello. She appeared rude not smiling or acknowledging some of the comments. If someone on the street says ‘Hey Girl’, is there any harm in responding? The few guys who followed her is definitely harassment (in fact I would be scared out of my brain). I run most mornings and if someone says hello to me, I either smile or say ‘hey’ back. Just polite I think.

    1. which is the point right? Why should women (as I had to) stay inside to avoid creeps like this who believe you owe them something because you are female…even if it IS just a smile on a day you’d rather not give one.

  27. I believe some of it is. When a man relentlessly asks a woman for her phone number and she does not even look at him. That’s harassment. Like, take a hint bro. When a man walks next to a woman for 5 minutes as if he is actually with her that is also harassment. That’s also scary as hell. Imaging that at night time when there are not a ton of people around. SCARY!!! When a man is like “oh dayummmmm”, referring to her sexually. That is harassment. If it was your 12 year old daughter would you consider it harassment? This all started for me when I was 12. A simple “good morning” or “have a nice day” I actually really love to hear. I don’t assume the intentions are bad.

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