I get a lot of messages like, ‘I wish I could find the confidence to write more, but English is not my first language…’ or ‘I doubt that any publisher would be interested in my silly little story…’ Call me a dreaming fool but I have rarely thought that way. My life has been one of knocking on doors, entering if they are opened or climbing in through the window. If that doesn’t work I call up a carpenter to discuss how I can build my own door.
But I get it. Rejection is horrid and it is that fear of it that frightens people from moving forward. I get it and my ‘ballsiness’ is not from lack of fear of rejection, it is more from perspective.
I always put it this way:
I may produce crap, but there are people who produce even bigger crap than I do who have been very successful producing their crap, so therefore there is room for me!
It’s all about perspective. You must find YOUR audience, not someone else’s. If you need a manager, partner, investor or agent for what you do, you must find the one who is right for YOU i.e the guy that likes YOUR crap, not the one who rejects you!
Of course I’m not suggesting that with this mindset you should produce sub par work either!
So with that in mind, here are:
10 Notes For Creative Souls And Entrepreneurs to help fight the fear.
1. Do you.
It doesn’t matter that someone else has made it as a top Mommy Blogger. That’s their schtick. What’s yours? What can YOU bring to the table that is essentially uniquely about you?
2. Where you are now is where you need to be to move forward.
You needed all the ‘errors’ and confusion and mis-steps just to get where you are now. None of it is wasted time. it’s learning time.
3. You have 2 choices.
Give up or go on. Simple. Guess which one JK Rowling took.
4. Action builds empires not talk.
Just get on with it. Stop with the chatting about what you hope to do and just start doing it now.
5. Find a coach.
I had loads of coaches for whatever thing I wanted to accomplish. The good thing is that I didn’t even have to pay them as they had no idea they were coaching me! From family members to Tony Robbins to Warren Buffet to Whitney Houston. Imagine the bill if they knew!
6. Rejection is good for you.
I firmly believe that if you are not getting rejected then you are not working hard enough. Every single successful person I know had to face rejection, why would you be any different?
7. No one gets to build muscle without breaking sweat.
I’m sure the good Lord will forgive me here but I’m going to name drop! I apologise upfront. We were going to dinner and I once asked Pele how he came to be considered one of the best football players ever. He said ‘Practise! Practise! Practise!’ People often like to throw around the old accusation disguised as a back-handed compliment, ‘oh that person is just naturally gifted or lucky.’ I’ve had it! And it’s bloody annoying and incredibly dismissive, because those folks are not around when you are busting a gut to get what you want. Sometimes it just takes sheer hard work and your hard work behind the scenes is what makes it look easy out front. Want folk to read your books? Don’t wait for a publisher, work your socks off and build your audience reader by reader. Want your online business to take off? Prepare not to sleep a lot.
8. You are stronger than you think.
A lot of people writing to me and doubting their abilities – and it has to be said, although men do it, it is mostly women – miss what I am seeing. I will mosey on down to their blog and spend some time getting to know them and in my eyes these women (and men) are performing little miracles everyday and yet they don’t see it. I read stories of them raising children, some with learning difficulties or physical issues, or just children period in a fairly crazy world. This requires more guts than a rejection from some nobody online or a book publisher who hasn’t even bothered to read your book, surely? Again, it’s all about perspective.
9. As long as you keep on trucking things will keep moving in the right direction.
If you just do a little bit every day those little bits will add up to something. Do nothing. Nothing will happen.
I can’t emphasize goal setting enough. Without them you are just doing a comedy wander in the desert, i.e going round in circles and loops and not even being aware of it.